What a term its been-Shit (Part 1)

Seriously been jacking of at school thats what this term was...I started to put my foot down in certain subjects and it worked...yet in some it just feels a waste to be honest-God knoes wat im gonna do for VCE at this rate. My head has been overtaken by Frank Sinatra, Louis Armstrong, Joe Williams and Ella Fitzgerald....in essence by swing/jazz singers. DAMN ARE THEY GOOD. For the black Americans in the 1990’s i tip my curry hat to you. The time of swing, blues, Smooth Jazz that and Retro Jazz has now made me an avid listener....fark can’t believe i missed the boat for the concert :’( Mum caught me singing to Sinatra and was amazed that i could sing (BLOODY no im gonna call her that :D) lols amazed by how deep and wonderful Armstrongs voice is, damn hes lucky niggah :P but then the times of today with everything centred around remixes, club mixes and techno also have their own type of nuances and mystical uptaking of the body that makes u wanna dance :D

But its wonderful how events can make a change in ure heart, to the way u listen to music. Im now bent on getting black, yes u heard me BLACK-If u had noticed the point of blackness to where i was wit Franklin in front of building 53 in Dickshafts photo.....idk why maybe i mite say it now maybe i mite not...but its all fate + Heat + Sun =(in the presence of Summer)

Now over the term shit has changed....alot, idk how but it just did. Fark me. Sometimes i feel like coming to this school was the worse choice possible...at times it was the best -AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH WTF i feel like raging thinking about shit but then i dont have the energy to. I just want to leave with my learners and party hard, but then i havent been to any parties lately...the effects of jomo

Alright ima go of and sleep now

being sick, vommiting high temperature kinda gets to ure head

Beard or No beard turns to havoc with Family

Well well well, the weekend that i just had was very relaxed...to relaxed must i say but who gives now with, what is it.....16 days odd to exams.

Saturday, i had to shave my 2 week old infant beard and boi was that boon and bane at the same time. Yes, i look definatly older and more capable to get the LADIES who are slightly older than me while at the same time get those near my age or younger (major NO NO for me)...... Well what way to celebrate a 40th birthday huh. Langley Hotel, Succulent lamb chops, chocolate mouse, some other desert that had a strong rum and chocolate sauce that got me a bit woozy, De Bortolio Pinot Chardinoy (and some other beautiful wines :P), and fortunatly being the only guy in a room with 1 other pretty darn fine girl. Farrrrrrrrrrrrk man so what happened was it was my mums best friends 40th and shes loaded. Her husband is a neurosurgeon at the Royal Melbournes, always on call but bloody cashed up. These guys have the most strangest upbringings.

My mums friend, well lets just say her parents are both doctors from Lanka who were well respected in both the Tamil and Sinhalese communtity, while her husbands parents were a quiet middle class family where he had to work his arse of to get to where he is right now. Amma in the morning was like u aint going cricket which was a boon seeing as my fricken ankle kept messing with my foot not letting me walk properly, but a bane seeing as i already told the boys that i am on the bus..... MENTAL DILEMNA

But who the heck gives at the moment...so i went for a change with my electric shaver (so much easier) going with the neat and regal look of the long side burns instead of the usual cut and short look, which even got myself looking double twice in the mirror (jks jks im not bever whose always in the boys toilet checking his middle parting), put on the shirt, the G-STAR :P and propped myself in the car for a good ride to heavens border....Sleep. First thing when i woke up was to find myself being made fun of by my sister picking my nose (insolent child grrrrrrrr) and some bogan at the car door opening it wide.

Shit. i rambled much.

Cut to the chase, typically curry but untypical for my mum a stickler for time, we were late (with reason :D) and we were given a rockstar entrance by ammas friends who cracked the shits at us. I was left with the oldies at the start but i shall come to that later.....

30 minutes later i was whisked away by this angel who was MY FRICKEN AGE... EYAH BABY, well the next hour or so i became once again the punching bag for my adopted brothers and sisters (mums friends children) who for some reason thought that it would be a show to their new found 'friend' ... bloody hell. Thankfully for me the clowns came in the form of Agent Smith and Agent Smith from CBI who wisked the under 15's leaving me on the floor once again. The next couple of hours, full of eating, and must i say a bit of drinking (water of course) was so AWESOME, gaaaaaaah why didnt i meet her before lols jks jks just kidding she is hot though was the best this whole term.

But ahhhhh alas i shall come to my next point before my headache gets the better of me... THe oldies who i were with fell in love with me as i with them, so good having the warmth and love of grandparents again near you. However i got the best advise about my life from them. I felt myself again, not that idiotic one at school nowadays but the one who still feels and acts like a little kid. But it seems like my mum is not the only side with powerful and influential characters. My dads great Uncle......SS RATNAM and my oldest uncle's godfather, google the guy, and then see if our noses are alike (apparently his was more pointier than mine)

Well signing of with a whole lot of thoughts that arent related to bio or methods but are alot on what i got from the party

P.s Still cant believe i got asked if i wanted wine and got away with it

P.s.s MUAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAAHHAHA SUCK ON THAT

P.s.s.s My head hurts

Man.Robot.God, and family

Right WAT UP

thing is this weekend would probably have been the best over a long time....shit bro cricket, sleep, temple-play the mrithangum-unwillingly picked up a chick for a mate, go of to an awesome party (whens the next one i swear), skip tuition in the morning, have a good old discussion about who was tanker with an old friend, and then have a good old curry birthday party.... :D

what made this party even more special i reckon was the fact that how families come together..... so what happened was that half of the crowd was munching away on there rice and curry when the rest of the people had to stand and wait...THE FOOD HAD RUN OUT.... see this a nightmare come true for currys, but must i say the love between that family sheezs. Instantly with just the word thambi (smaller brother) the youngest one jumped into the car...i went with him...easily bet couple of racers and got the food, raced back in less than 10 minutes. Must i say i was pissing myself with a) laughter and b) self preservation

CHANGE TOPIC

Just go with an open mind just to enjoy the combination of Shankar, Rahman, Rajnikant and aishwarya rai. Rajni defies all odds in this movie and people screaming and whistling for him from the opening song. Of course there is no bang opening like the usual rajni movies, but its rajni, rajni, rajni all the way! Watch out, I don’t want to spoil the fun!

I was amazed at the way certain pockets of the story were handled and the second half is too good. Rajni as robot has some negative shades, and it’s a cake walk for him. I could see glimpses of his characters of classics like Nettrikan, Moondru Mugam (Alex pandiyan) and Nenaithale innikum, all rolled up into one! Enthiran does steal your heart, especially in the emotional last frame!

His makeup and hair style do make him look quite younger and Aishwarya looks stunning in her costumes of Manish Malhotra. She completely steals the frames in all the songs.. The songs are shot in some picturesque beaches and the song “Kilimanjaro” shot in Machu Pichu is amazing! Special effects, in the second half are creative and shankar’s brilliance flashes.

Some points I would like to mention about the movie are:

1. This is a complete masala movie with comedy, song, dance, romance, fight, sentiment.
2. The story’s base is Science Fiction – but it is a science fiction masala.
3. That means, do not expect a complete Sci-Fi genre movie like Terminator. But expect a movie like Avatar. (Indian version of Avatar).
4. It has all the ingredients to make it attractive to children, youngsters, family members, ladies and Rajini’s mass audience.
5. The last 45 – 50 minutes will be a celebration for Rajini fans.
6. The animations are never before seen in Indian cinema and takes Indian cinema to next level in terms of visual effects and animations
7. The stunt sequences are again, the best in Indian cinema.
8. He was sure that the movie will be liked by Hindi audience too.
9. He was absolutely sure that Rajini’s performance as the villain will win him a National Award.
10. He was also sure that A.R. Rahman will win next year’s National Award for BGM.
11. He said that the climax Symphony based BGM by Rahman is worth even Grammy awards.
12. The one point that the Hindi audience may not like is comedy that is specific to south India. He said, they may cut there scenes in Hindi.
13. The International audience who like song and dance will enjoy the movie. But, the film will not impress international audience in general as this will be a typical Indian masala movie.
14. The movie will definitely break all records for sure.

right so theres a little sum up of my thoughts of the movie.......but its the themes that are weaved through the film that is mind boggling. What gets me thinking is that robots are gonna be huge in the coming years and decades. THey have already taken over sweeping, vaccuming and now security....its just a matter of time before they start becoming like us. The issue im trying to pull across is what happens if robots are used against us? think about it..... and then post

Ceya aligators

P.s Exams and parents just dont go well with each other do they....

One of a kind....

Been all over the world

Done a little bit of everything

Little bit of everywhere

With a little bit of everyone

All the girls I've been with

Things I've seen it takes much to impress

But sure enough you go it makes your soul stand up from all the rest

I can be in love

But I just don't know

Baby one thing is for certain

Whatever you do it's working

All the girls don't matter

In your presence can't do what you do

There's a million girls around but I don't see no one but you

Girl you're so one in a million

You are

Baby you're the best I ever had

Best I ever had

And I'm certain that

There ain't nothing better

No there ain't nothing better than this

You're not a regular girl

You don't give a damn about your look

Talking about I can't do it for you

But you can do it for yourself

Even though that ain't so

Baby cause my dough don't know how to end

But that independent thing I'm with it

All we do is win baby

I could be in love

But I just don't know

Baby one thing is for certain

Whatever you do it's working

All the girls don't matter

In your presence can't do what you do

There's a million girls around but I don't see no one but you

Baby you're so one in a million

You are

Baby you're the best I ever had

Best I ever had

And I'm certain that

There ain't nothing better

No there ain't nothing better than this

Girl you're so one in a million

You are

Baby you're the best I ever had

Best I ever had

And I'm certain that

There ain't nothing better

No there ain't nothing better than this

Timing girl

Only one in the world

Just one of a kind

She mine

Ooh all that I can think about is what this thing could be

A future baby

Baby you're one of a kind

That means that you're the only one for me

Only one for me

Baby (girl) you're so one in a million

You are

Baby you're the best I ever had

Best I ever had

And I'm certain that

There ain't nothing better

No there ain't nothing better than this

Girl you're so one in a million

You are

Baby you're the best I ever had

Best I ever had

And I'm certain that

There ain't nothing better

No there ain't nothing better than you

Last day of Hols-Fail blog

Right so its the last day..Sunday and im buggered

Right now everything seems like its another body away, asin im not experiencing anything

The boys came over......OH YEAH soo much fun got up to soo much shit, i must say the best and dangerous time of my life :P but then saturday and the GF came around and i was like fml all those wogs, afgans and other randoms are gonna cheer for something finally......

Ahhh i dont knoe wat to say right now...ive been getting spells of dizzyness (is this good or bad???)

More or less like this post........................................this holidays has been a waste

Hopefully ive recharged enof for the exams------god thinking about it is making me sick already

Back to the pavilion boys

P.s Someone slap me awake in class :P

639 and a map

You maybe wondering why the heck i have the number 639 as my title.

Maybe if u type up the word Muscles u may find a hit.......

Im not gonna go on about how my body is developing..i have a long way to go till i can say i have got a basic body. But what do u think is the strongest muscle in ure body????

a) The uterus (shut up and look down)

b) Gluteous Maximus

c) The Jaw

any ideas....well in fact all these three are correct

Dont look shocked-i aint pulling ure legs

so over this holidays i have been only excersising B and C as much as u lot would like to think A

i havent got the energy to do any reps...i dont have the energy to play outside...i dont have the energy to be my self

thing is i dont knoe myself anymore....im becoming more like the person i hated to be in primary school, and mum knoes that too, nowadays she tells me of for acting to old....wtf am i meant to say, while everyone gets to tell the whole world they have a gf, im stuck baaaaaaaaaaaah stuff this shit, i dont knoe random frenzy........

The map is not the territory

The map is not the territory is just another way to point to the same thing. The map is the concept of what we have in the mind about something. It’s a belief, an image or a thought-pattern. We use this map in the same way as we use a city-map to find a location. If the map is correct, we will find our location. If it is slightly incorrect, we have to correct it by new knowledge, optimize it. If it is completely incorrect or we move to another city, we have to replace the map altogether. What is happening is that we changed the map. And this is happening all the time.

Another map is the self-image or we may call it the ego. It is everything we saved about ourselves. It is the map of ourselves and we act from it. We want to improve our self-image and we use our intellectual abilities to do so: we get our desires and we set goals and work towards them. The map called the ego is a very useful map that we constantly create ourselves. But here is the important thing: it is still a map.

It’s nice to have a map, as long as you know it’s a map

Which means:

1. The map can change : which means our self-concept (the ego, who we think we are) can change and this is the basis of personal development. This changing map includes our thoughts, beliefs and actions: the whole world-view and the self-image.

2. The map is not the territory : I am not the ego, my self-image. You are not your self-image, or in other words: You and I are not who we think we are; think in the literally sense of the word: thoughts (and all other concepts) are the map, not the territory.

The important step to Spiritual Awakening is dropping the map and experiencing what is without the map.

But, (for me at least) this means not to remove the map for all time. I need the map to function in the world and to relate to everything. So I create maps and use maps in a very intense way, in the best way possible. But there is one difference: I dis-identified the map from the territory. So I know that my self-image is my self-image but not the self.

Ken Wilber called the process "Transcend and include". Or as Genpo Roshi put it: the reason we are able to transcent the ego but still use it as a human being is that we know the Being side of the Human Being as well as the Human Side: check my posting about Personal Power vs. The Power of Now for more.

This is a Zen story I found on the website Pointing To The Moon :

"When Zen Master Nan-chuan saw his student Ma-tsu diligently practicing meditation hour after hour, he sensed a certain effort and ambition in the young monk’s demeanor, so he sneaked up behind him and asked, "What are you doing?" "I’m trying to become a Buddha," Ma-tsu replied proudly. Nan-chuan then picked up a stone and began rubbing it against a spare tile from the monastery floor. Hearing the sound, Ma-tsu asked, "What are you doing?" Said Nan-chuan: "I’m trying to make a mirror." Ma-tsu had an awakening.

And it goes on:

Everything is just as it is! Ma-tsu is Ma-tsu, the tile is the tile, and you are you, just as you are. There’s no Buddha apart from this fundamental truth, and any attempt to achieve some special state of mind just leads you away from who and what you already are. In the direct approach to truth …, the direct recognition of your true nature is available in every instant, on or off the cushion, whether you meditate or not. You merely need to "take the backward step that turns your light inward to illuminate the Self," as Dogen Zenji said." – Stephan Bodian

Time to shine i reckon

P.s Wants to do something....except not sure wat to do

Wow so long

Its been ages hasnt it.

I mean really bloody bored seeing as i cnt do anything thanks to my thumb

causing my... well developing body to be incomplete and rapidly spiraling into fatness

cant see any of those chiseled abbs now :D

but if u think about it, yoga could do a whole lot of stuff for u .... seriously-its all about the balance

the balance what all the teachers were saying at the start of the year, but wit now poor Webs trying to inhance. SO there way of saying is balance has been said ages ago---- Yin Yang.

Yin-Yang represents the ancient Chinese understanding of how things work. The outer circle represents "everything", while the black and white shapes within the circle represent the interaction of two energies, called "yin" (black) and "yang" (white), which cause everything to happen. They are not completely black or white, just as things in life are not completely black or white, and they cannot exist without each other.

While "yin" would be dark, passive, downward, cold, contracting, and weak, "yang" would be bright, active, upward, hot, expanding, and strong. The shape of the yin and yang sections of the symbol, actually gives you a sense of the continual movement of these two energies, yin to yang and yang to yin, causing everything to happen: just as things expand and contract, and temperature changes from hot to cold.

Its funny isnt it, that its only now have i realised that u sometimes need that other person to be ure counterpart. I mean ever upto this yr i have never needed someone so badly, i mean yr 7 and 8 were like shit but this yr has given me some new shit to digest ......... but just remember, what goes around, comes around

but as much as i want to rant, im keepin it in, there are people out there who just dont understand the pain people go through when they do something. heres an example that ive been through, a girl meets a random guy (MUHAHHAHHA) that she has no idea and suddenly finds spark occuring.... thing is though he has someone that likes him. Now wat shall he do, go wit the chick that he doesnt knoe, or the the girl that he knoes but doesnt like??????? Now, u woulds probs going wtf but, i feel for the person who he knoes already as she would have to put up wit loosing someone she lves for some bloody random that the guy has no idea of. I mean FAAR OUT.hmmmmmm enof of this shit

soooo im stuffed, im starting to represent a graph now, i dont knoe it is a parabola or a linear maybe even a sin graph, but this year i have been declining....shit loads. First started of with Science, then English, then my relationships wit certain staff and now with methods. BS i swear, i feel like i want to do something in life, go to the gym, get my drivers license, get the love booming again, but i swear ..... im soon gonna hit the bottom if it wasnt for certain people.

F*** of mate :D

listening to the all time oldie black and white tamil songs

P.s Cant believe how strong some people are, even when there lives have been changed, they still can manage to laugh

CHORDS and Love

So on Monday i was on the bus, nothing special everything seemed the norm with everyone chattering away like we always do. The thing is though, once the bus started to move we were greeted by a rendition of a rock song by a drunk man. YES, i knoe ure not allowed to have alcohol in a bus but comon whose gonna enforce it if hes not already intoxicated. But coming back to the event, all the guys from our school were pissing themselves, apart from myself and another person, because he was drunk and singing of the top of his lungs. SO WAT, obviously he wasnt given the same love and care we have been showered upon. Well throughout the trip the guy was singing and drinking-just making a nuisance of himself when he made told the Mazenod boys that he was from Salesian. Now this struck a chord, when i turned around i saw it was a mates brother who was actually probably someone to look at in the future last year. But damn what it did to show to take things carefully

CHANGE OF SUBJECT

Okay so i have been bored after that bloody maths test so i was researching on what the CIVILISED world have made to conclude with Hinduism. Now this part may go against peoples ideas but then again, i respect one and all. Now im pretty sure you would have heard this but seeing as i have gone to a Catholic high school and primary school, i can say that i do knoe a bit more than ure normal kent walking down the street about Christians.

KRISHNA AND CHRIST

1.Yeshua and Krishna were called both a God and the Son of God

2.Both was sent from heaven to earth in the form of a man.

3.Both were called Savior, and the second person of the Trinity.

4.Both encountered a Gentile woman at a well.

5.Both celebrated a last supper. Both forgave his enemies.

6.Angels in both cases issued a warning that the local dictator planned to kill the baby and had issued a decree for his assassination. The parents fled. Mary and Joseph stayed in Muturea; Krishna's parents stayed in Mathura.

7.Both Yeshua and Krishna withdrew to the wilderness as adults, and fasted.

8.Both were identified as "the seed of the woman bruising the serpent's head."

9.Jesus was called "the lion of the tribe of Judah." Krishna was called "the lion of the tribe of Saki."

10.Both performed many miracles, including the healing of disease. One of the first miracles that both performed was to make a leper whole. Each cured "all manner of diseases."

10 different yet obviously plain in sight for me when i compare this two great souls. Now all i want to do is bring one more comparison...

The role of water: Most Christians baptize either mature members or infants in the congregation. Sometime this is done by total immersion in water; sometimes by sprinkling water over the individual's head. In the Roman Catholic Church, baptism is a sacrament that washes away the person's original sin. Immersion in water by Hindus is also an important ritual. "Water in Hinduism has a special place because it is believed to have spiritually cleansing powers...In the sacred water distinctions of caste are supposed to count for nothing, as all sins fall away...Every temple has a pond near it and devotees are supposed to take a bath before entering the temple."

SO what the point im gonna start talking about is how religions are all saying and proving one thing -

LOVE

Now when i mean by love i dont mean by insanely kissing the hottest person around...(me :D) but by accepting the people around us even if it means hiding ure feeling about someone that u dislike "

You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget." Lets just say in life shit gets complicated when u grow up i mean my cosin defined love in the way she saw it

"Love is when Mummy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."......More like Curry AHAHHAHAHAHA

Dong maber 

P.s I HAVE A COVER FOR MY IPOD..abit late

....

De activating FB soon too much trouble

Rite now all that im feeling is remorse, confusion, sadness and utter contempt of myself

I let down my parents like hell ... ive lost that Arjun inside me

Ive become a person who i would used to say in yr 4 a bad boy

brutally honest, fml

first become that boy back in primary school

second get the respect back from my parents

third all that talk to Girls

fourth ill stop the swearing

fifth doing wat the brain says, not what the heart says

who knoes this maybe the last time u mite see the laughing, playing side of Arjun

FML

All i have to say is FML

how the heck am i gonna do it

someone shoot me naa but that would mean im a coward

far out maybe next one ill write shit

What an illusion this world is.....

One look in ure life....ure on top of the world

Second time u look....ure at the bottom of the world

Third time U look .... ure on the rise like a phoenix

sometimes

that special one

means so much to u

that its no longer about u

its about them

i considered other girls

but NO ONE comes close

shes special

shes different

to the rest of the girls

it will be my secret

i want to knoe her

i want to love her completly

truely madly ever and ever

That was the thoughts of my man.....

Can you ever really want to be in a strange situation as him right now... bugger

The only girl hes asked out, that one girl he truly loved, wants him back (APPARENTLY) , and the guys only been back to form just recently. Okay you may think that this nothing...but here is where it gets confusing. His friend comes out of the closet and tells him that he likes someone....and that someone is his Ex. WELLLLL... he didnt say straight to his face that it was her but one piece of shit to another and them BAM, it hits you.

Yes its true, he wants her, loves her but to the point where he doesnt want to get hurt again. You see, he cant live without his friends, his friends cant live without him. End of story. Even if it means giving up that one bright spark in your life which is shining your path in life. Very tough but he has made up his decision about letting her go for his friend. I mean, he too has been hurt, very bad and he cant let him go through the same shit with out anything else that is in his power.

But the one thing which is making this whole shit effed up is that a passerby has told him that its her friends thats not sure about him---not the other way around--- telling her that she should be the one forgiving him for all hes done... i mean WTF MANG...wats he ever done. last time i saw it was him that was told that she 'THOUGHT" (emapsis on THOUGHT) she liked him but didnt after the illusion fell away....hmmmmmmm

Well on a personal note i have rekindled some fading friendships...cant believe i didnt make time for them, but i believe the truest friendships come from the heart and give each other what they want....Love ya mate

До свидания!

Ancient Mystics, Spirituality and a Perfect Curry

With bronze as a mirror one can correct one’s

appearance; with history as a mirror, one can

understand the rise and fall of a state; with good

men as a mirror, one can distinguish right from wrong.

-LI SHIMIN, TANG EMPEROR TAIZONG

Even with good men around me as true companions, I am surrounded by this veil of confusion, disarray and cbf (thanks Kasia :D...i hope u won’t read this :P) Yesterday i was in the most randomest moods. At times i would be laughing without a care in the world like a Dolphin; at times i would be silent as the snake before it strikes; at times i would be shouting like a crazed bear looking for something to rip into; while at others i would be like a sloth just taking everything so laid back. I now consider myself as eagle, at the top of the world, without anyone to be afraid of. Yes i may now be starting to sound quite eerie. But yes. Ive changed. I can transform into the mystics of different animals without realising.

Strange what reading different ancient holy books can do to you. I have just recently finished reading the bible, some small Vedas and a whole lot of the Bhagavad Gita. Funny how today’s scientists are merely proving the concepts and beliefs of the ancient civilisations. Ever heard of the entanglement theory....whether the answer is a “F*** of” or a “yeah but how the heck do u knoe that shit”, did you Entanglement was at the core of primeval beliefs. Bloody hell, the names are as old as history----

BRAHMAN, TAO, DHARMAKAYA....Can i add, man’s oldest spiritual quest was to perceive his own entanglement, to sense his own interconnection with all things. To be ONE with the universe, or in other words...to achieve “at-one-ment” What do Christians and Jews still strive for...atonement (DO THE MATHS MUSH...wtf man im surprised that didn’t catch on :D)

To be more specific, polarity-the positive/negative balance of the subatomic realm...if anyone one reads the Bhagavad Gita, Krishna talks about a dual world with balance....even the Kybalion (bet u never heard of it :D) talks about the binary system and the opposing forces in nature.

There are thousands of other examples such as the Heisenberg uncertainty principle underSub-atomics....The Upanishads, the sacred Vendantic scriptures was actually studied and credited by Heisenbeg and Schrődinger (ding-a-ling) both studied this text and credited it with helping them to formulate their theories. BUT whats so awesome is that there is a new cosmological model called the Superstring theory, suggesting that the universe was made up of 10 dimension, which all interacted with each other like vibrating guitar strings.....was actually in the ZOHAR, the base text of early Jewish mysticism that was once confined to the most intellectual rabbis (sexism much :D)

But all these books have given me a spiritual look at life, and at the moment they all point out that you need a woman at your side to be with you when you move through the various levels. Sure I don’t want to be like Bever who says he wants to be a Brahmachari (suck shit niggaaaaah :P) but i want to be able to experience all of life. A new start. I don’t want to do what i did before-letting my lust and must i quote Karen “Dick” manipulate my brain into synthesising feelings to a girl on the move while i was still enjoying being a trouble maker J.

Onto another subject now, i was thinking, the three other guys who i consider family...Gorilla, Bever, and Frankilin...we combine make up the perfect curry. Franklin's sexy back muscles, Gorillas hairy yet massive arms, Bever's ripped Abbs, and my pecs combined would make up a force of reckoning

Then we would have to say good-bye. I hate good-byes. I know what I need. I need more hellos. ~Charles M. Schulz

P.s FARKIN hell, Bever's come out of the closet with 8 fantastic abbs, while i am eating like theres no tomorow....bloody anorexic :D amma's like u aint gonna get ure useless abbs if u keep on eating rice and curry like ure dad :(

P.s.s Franklin and I have now a meaning to life...bring out the inner Hercules to the outside.

P.s.s.s Far out, three girls all at the same time, what more could you not ask for .....

Last words before new life..i hope

Straight back into the time
A memory that can never be erased
I have this empty feeling
and i am gonna miss everything..

After all this time
I would fall asleep
and just dream about you
I crash on the floor and a part of me dies..

You broke me down
At least i never gave up on you
You can see it all right ?
Then why can't you ask me to stop this and come back to you again ?
You just sat back and watched me break
and when you will realize you were wrong
The memories will fade
and my lonely mind will forgive and forget you.
Later,
It will be my turn to see you break
and I am waiting for this time
Waiting for your turn..

I remember you walking away from my life
The way you threw away my heart
and it lost the way to home and
my broken heart is lost.

Now, As i breathe out, the past is gone
Its been long, I've been in this storm
And now i have found myself so far away from your thoughts..
But still, I miss the life and YOU.

Damn Poetry is flowing out of my bloody brain :D

Every morning, a sun shines on my face,
waking me up..
I smile and think?
Will this morning bring something new ?

Every day is the same
Life is lame.
I go out and from underneath the trees, I watch the sky.
I dream that you'd be mine.

I go backward and then I go forward again,
Just to find you
& in the evening when i return back home
your lights guide me home.

And then comes the night..
where tears stream down my face
when i feel, i am loosing something and i can't replace
the moon casts a night spell and start confusing me
And I feel like a puzzle & i can't find my missing piece
& the world is black and white
No color and light


I hope the sky falls on me, But the moonlight makes me sleep with confused thoughts.

Love Story :D hehe i was bored

Day started with a sunrise. As usual. But there was something different about that day. The sun was shining a lot more than usual and the birds were in a happy mood. Chirping with little louder voice. What was so special on that day ?

Halo was on his bed. Thinking, What is so special ?
& Delilah texts him, 'Good Morning. I love you' .
Halo replies, " I was waiting for your text, you know I like it.. When you text me first "

Delilah smiles and replied, 'I know love' .
Halo texts back, " The weather is strange today .. Its lovely "

Delilah replies back, ' Here its so hot. I wish I was with you to see this strange weather '

Halo and Delilah are in love with each other. But, The distance separates them. They are ' 1000 miles away ' : )

2 days later ..

Halo proposes Delilah. Asking her to spend life together. Forever. Happily : )

Delilah blushes. Accepts it.

" Love was in the air "

Their hearts linked.
They started building memories together. Shared dreams. Loved each other.
Every night was a struggle for them. Every night, Delilah used to text her poems she wrote for him and this made Halo sleep peacefully and happily.


Halo was the luckiest man alive on this planet .

He was going out of town for a month, And that was the time, When they fought for the first time in their life.
Reason was, A guy called Troy, Message Halo that, Delilah is his girl and they are into relationship from past 8 frigging months.
Halo was into pieces.
In a month, halo was totally into Delilah and was completely in love.

He was at the airport, Called Delilah.
Delilah cleared everything.. But he was upset because Delilah never shared it with him. Halo heard her crying for the first time. He was upset.

On the way.. Halo thought about it.
He decided to forget it and carry on and forgave Delilah.

Halo was working hard. He was kinda busy all day and tired. Delilah understood him well that time and took well care of Halo.
They were falling for each other, Harder & Harder.

Halo returns back.
He was happy. He missed his friends and family.

It was Delilah's birthday.
Halo was the first one to wish her. He felt special. Kissed her and hung up.
Halo desperately wanted to talk to Delilah. But, Delilah was kinda busy with party.
He got upset and texted Delilah something bad. Fucked up Delilah's birthday.
Later he realised, He did a wrong thing. He asked for forgiveness.
Delilah replied, ' Iloveyou '.

Things were back to normal again. Life was pretty awesome.
But, If life is so simple, then it ain't life.

Halo & Delilah's relationship were going from some ups and downs. Every relationship does.
They fought twice or more than that in a week.

Still, they never gave up. They just loved each other more after every fight. It was cute.

They were blindly in love.

Halo and Delilah, were into social networking sites. This is the place where they first met each other <3
They had many best friends and mutuals there.

Halo knew a guy called ' Cong ', who stayed in his city.
He never liked him.
How can a guy like another guy ? Rare chances .

Cong became Delilah's new best friend. Halo asked her to stay away from that guy and Delilah being sweet, Replied, ' Okay ' : )

On a sunny day, Halo received a call from Delilah.
Delilah gave him the best news.
What was it ?

` DELILAH WAS GOING TO VISIT HALO.

Halo was super excited and pretty nervous.
He never showed his excitement. Because, He thought, every time he showed up his excitement, It never happened.

Like always, Delilah and halo were on a call.
And planning their meet.
Halo asked her, Who else is Delilah meeting ?
Delilah named few good friends and included Cong too.
Halo became little insecured. He asked Delilah, Not to meet Cong. Delilah replies, ' Okay. If you say so, I am not meeting '

They were happy. Life was happy. HALO WAS THE HAPPIEST MAN ALIVE.

14.05.2010 -

One afternoon, They were on call and Halo said that, I am super excited to meet you.
They were talking .. and Delilah got a second call.
She kept Halo on hold and attended.

Halo asked, " Who was it " ?
Delilah replied, ' Cong '.

Halo became a bit furious and from past few days, Halo and Delilah were fighting alot and Halo was not getting attention. He thought, Delilah is ignoring him. She got bored of him.

Halo hung up.
Delilah called back and asked what happened ?
Halo replied, " I don't want to talk about it " .

Delilah replies, ' It won't work .. Halo. It won't. I want to be single and these fights.. it won't work '

Halo lost his world.
He lost the reason to live.

They were not talking.
Delilah asked her, ' Are we meeting ' ?

Halo being in pain replied, " No. If we do, It will be impossible for me to get over you "

Halo was totally in vain. His friends supported him. Brought his old smile and charm back.

Delilah was in Halo's city for 10 days.
They were not talking to each other from past, 14 DAYS !

Halo was living without her.. But was into her thoughts.
He wanted to text, But then something stopped him and he kept on saving all the texts in draft.

He was hating his life.
He started smoking.
But, later he realised, He promised his world, He is not smoking.. So was forced to quit it .

Delilah was back in her city.
Finally, Halo broke the silence. Texted Delilah and they were talking life good friends.. And Halo never gave up on her.
They became best friends.

One night, Delilah messaged Halo, ' if I realise, I was a fool and i want you back in my life.. Do i have a place now ' ?
Halo replied, " My heart is only for you " <3


They were back. Not in a relation. They were not interested in long distance anymore.
Delilah was going to come to his city for future studies, so they decided to get committed at that piece of time.
Without any arguments, both of them accepted.

HAPPY LIFE AGAIN ! !
But, Life ain't simple. Remember ?

Not being in any relationship, They were still fighting.
Halo was over possessive, crazy and insecured. EVERY GUY WHO IS IN LOVE IS : )

Fights again but loving each other too.

Cong and Delilah were quite close. Halo never liked him.
And Delilah was little careless.

Halo, Being over possessive, got hurt. He was not liking the closeness.. He had the fear of loosing his world again.
So, Most of the fights were because of it & Delilah being careless.


Then came a day, When Halo came to know from some sources that, Cong is spreading shit about Halo & Delilah's relationship.
He felt bad.. No one has the right to talk shit about him and his girl.

He texted Delilah about it. Major fight.

This time, Halo decided to leave Delilah.
Both were broken.

Life was sad again.
They both lost each other.

They were not ready to give up on each other. Why would they do it ? They loved each other. It was more than love.

Halo was lost.
Halo decided to get back to this friendship.

He decided, He will change his attitude towards things and will change himself for her. Just for her world. <3

He texted Delilah. They both had some sorta deal.

Halo was changed.
His life was changed for a girl.
They took a risk.
They failed to succeed. Halo never deserved her.


Delialah, Left Halo with a phrase ` You hurt me more than loving me.

And, It made Halo unstable.

It ended.


The love story which they found will last -forever- ended in 160 days.


Life ain't so simple. You have to uncomplicate the complicated things to make your life happy and liveable.
People can actually change in love. But always change for the perfect one. Take right decisions in love. One wrong decision in love can fuck up your life.
Halo changed for her. They wanted to live happy together.


Now they are friends. They left their love on destiny.
Still, Loving each other. Waiting for each other.

In relationship, Always take chances. Even if you know , It'll hurt you, Take chance. Pick up the pieces and ask your lover to fix it (:

One ALMIGHTY DILEMNA

No matter how many people you manipulate, no matter how many people you toy with and screw with their heads, no matter how many friends you can make, always remember this. Deep down, when the shit hits the fan, you’re alone. You’re always alone. It’s you against the world. No one else.

Thanx to old mate but damn...that quote is making a whole load of sense....Its funny coz thats what exactly happens in exams, work, and in life

CHANGE TOPIC :D

What would you do...no if ure reading this next part i want u to really think about it, My good old friend, yes im posting another one of life stories ( SUCK SHIT :P) but yes, so as we all knoe he loved a girl, but the girl dumped (im not sure thats the right word) him, giving the most random azzz explantion and then went of with his friend. RIGHT....so now that alleged friend wants to be on talking terms (just a bit strange) but its pretty obvious that the guy dislikes/hates my friend.

SHEEZ, talking about a dickhead (ill call him that from now one) thats gonna backstab. Right, so the hero of our tale has tried to forget her ...VALIANTLY to must i add doing everything to from making him look ugly, goin black and trying a whole new lifestyle ... to be told be a mate that she broke up wit MR dickhead and that she has now so called MIXED EMOTIONS...

Tell me what should he do, go and get her or leave the girl that played him alone?

Onto my own life now, im telling you all now, im not gonna make the same mistake if i get married. Its my grandfathers thiti(death aniversary) on the 6th of august but his actual day of death is on the 23. For My dads mother and father, both my dad and asiappa's(second older uncle) go and give their offerings to the priest at the temple for their parents (sometimes at home to). But then after that we have a family lunch all together thats vegetarian..FULL STOP

Sure this is great getting the family together, but is it fair that their is one rule for my dad and another for my mum. Farking hell, this is pissing me of real bad now. So tomoz we have to do our respects to (who i think is a bloody great man) and my uncle calls up to invite us to dinner. NOWmy own blood and bones (im starting to get ashamed of callin him my uncle atm) says its only going to be meat orientated, mums like wtf we r goin to the temple, and then he says naa the kids( Athavan, Amirthaa and I) can eat cant they....im not sure about u guys but my family is based on our values and this goes against mine. Bloody bastard. Yes it is wrong for me to say this against my own Uncle, but still after this rant im gonna go back liken him....

Over and out

P.s Hate wearing those neck braces

P.s.s My voice is still jack of shit :D

P.s.s.s I need to get unconfuseed

P.s.s.s.s Coughing up blood at night isnt a very pleasant experience

Cbf this month

Man its been so long writing on my blog

seriously, i remember when it helped me where i can put down what came straight from the heart to somewhere for future reference, but i just feel so not lazy, not that stupid word everyone in JOMo uses (wtf is it ahhhhh) PROCASTINATE lol brutha but shit just comes into me and then the music just helps it keep it going to the nucleus envelope of my heart cells, where i can hide and bring it out when im by myself....

Today was f.. no im not gonna swear, stuffed up. Man what a friends there for. To laugh when ure laughing, to cry when ure crying,

IN ESSENCE TO BE THERE FOR YOU

Ive been through the pain that i wanted to feel so i can think about that whenever i next have the dilemna of a girl asking me out (no chance wit my new hair cut XD....bloody army look apparently). But that doesnt mean ill stop my friends from falling into this trap, actually i want them to so then they can experience life and learn from the shit that goes through wit having a highschool attracti0n (i aint gonna say love :D)

The kiss (if ure that advanced)

The flirty convos

The holding hands

The idea that she might be the one

The doubts that come through about the two of u

The hugs

The goddamn "URE REALLY NICE AND EVERYTHING BUT I JUST CANT DO THIS" talk

The sudden gloomyiness

The f*** it all thoughts

The Sad music playing through the headphones

The why do i even want to see her

The she threw me out like rubbish

The i want to do something to help ......

Now this may not be the case for everyone but as far as i see it this last one is what changes ure life !!!!!

Seriously, all i did if u guys have dared read this before (jokes relax, im still gonna chop of ure....) was a a couple of skotch, but if there is one thing i will impress on people is that smoking and alcohol will ruin ure life. Smoking and me go way back...i leave that for another time

4 hours later.....

My head feels so much more freerer after that run. But damn my boxing body has now been replaced by my more athletic, more toned body (bloody sucks at times)

I mean when i was doing my weight gaining stuff i was actually looking like i was a force to reckon with, especially on sat and sun night, all the curries and wogs just looked at me in epic AWENESS :D it was MINT,

U could see my arms and my pecs when i wore my t-shirt and stuff but then...i didn’t have my abbs, when i say that asin u could only see them as two long ass mother******* but then now u can see each and every indivial abb (YES BITCH)

I like what i see, shame the bloody camera died on me before i could show the results, but my head is now so much more clearer....like hell it is, damn man i feel good. Man now that i actually knoe that i can achieve being the just the right look, feels awesome...but i feel like running again, more and MOre and MORE. Its my ecstacy which is now fuelling me, i feel light now without anything bothering me,

Man damn i like what i see tomorrow in the bathroom, i am gonna get back to my usual antics, and i wont care if anyone sees me coz if they have a problem....Just say it to my face once again yeah bloody hell, i may not take it well then but i will think about it :D. Did i tell u i feel good

So long niggahs

Watched Merlin (youtube style) good shit but when the heck is the NEW SERIES COMING OUT !!!!!

Mite get a good nite sleep tonite :D

P.s Ilove my abbs

P.s.s I love my semi-complete pecs major

P.s.s.s I Love my buffed up thighs

P.s.s.s.s Hate my head and its contents

Short and sweet....Im Back

Even though i have a lot of things to express

this is not the time nor the mood for it

but

IM BACK

officially with vengeance

cbf just doing shit half heartedly

from now on, im going to be the Arjun everyone knew in Term 1,

the Arjun that will make a decision on the beat and keep on going

thats me here...thats me then....thats me now.....thats me in the future

But its gonna be the next couple of weeks that decides whether or not the other side of me will return, i dont wont them to come back yet i want that side to live on the outside for a bit.

However its been some time since the wild side of me was unleashed, the side that doesnt distinguish between good and bad but wats rite and wrong, and it returned in fashion

Yesterday my neighbour was accosted by 6 youths (sounds like a police report) however they werent there for a simple mugging, they were there for retribution....a family insult but wat ever the matter was, group bashings are plain cowardly, simple one on one is all it takes but to make it worse......knives

now thats just insane, so thats when i came, those faggots had no idea wat him them but they ran like hell (lucky i knoe my biology, if i missed the straps by a millimetre i would have cut through his arms....but god did it feel good to have pure adreneline go through ure blood, but the my neighbour is good, same age as me, but already tied up in gangs guns and blood

funny enough the same wrist that was used to love was used to fight...any interconnections can i point out but all i have to say is that it takes just a tiny match of love to burn down a forest of a mans ambition. Until this moment, i never understood how hard it was to lose something you never had

Allahi mana ay

listining to Usure Pogudhey by A.R. Rahman from Raavanan...bloody fantastic movie(beats the hindi version easily)

Ps. I styled this after Damien's posts

Pss. The next one will be more in dept...maybe

Psss. Has put on weight yet looks as good as ever

Drop the world on YOU

I got ice in my veins, blood in my eyes
Hate in my heart, love in my mind
I seen nights full of pain, days of the same
You keep the sunshine, save me the rain
I search but never find, hurt but never cry
I work and forever try, but I’m cursed, so never mind
And it’s worse, but better times seem further and beyond
The top gets higher the more that I climb
The spot gets smaller, and I get bigger
Tryna get into where I fit in, no room for a n*gga
But soon for a n*gga it be on, mu’f*cka
‘Cause all the bullshit, it made me strong, mu’f*cka

So I pick the world up and I’ma drop it on your f*ckin’ head
Bitch, I’ma pick the world up and I’ma drop it on your f*ckin’ head
And I could die now, Rebirth motherf*cker
Hop up in my spaceship and leave Earth, motherf*cker
I’m gone
Motherf*cker, I’m gone

I know what they don’t wanna tell you
Just hope you’re heaven-sent, and you’re hell-proof
I-I walk up in the world and cut the lights off
And confidence is the stain they can’t wipe off
Huh, my word is my pride
But wisdom is bleak, and that’s a word from the wise
Served to survive, murdered and bribed
And when it got too heavy I put my burdens aside

So I could pick the world up and I’ma drop it on your f*ckin’ head
Bitch, I’ma pick the world up and I’ma drop it on your f*ckin’ head
And I could die now, Rebirth motherf*cker
Hop up in my spaceship and leave Earth, motherf*cker
I’m gone
Motherf*cker, I’m gone (I’m gone)

It hurts, but I never show this pain you’ll never know
If only you could see just how lonely and how cold
And frostbit I’ve become, my back’s against the wall

When push come to shove, I just stand up and scream “F*ck ‘em all”

Man, it feels like these walls are closing in
This roof is caving in, up its time to razor-thin
Your days are numbered like pagers and
My book of rhymes, got ‘em cookin’, boy
This crooked mind of mine got ‘em all
Shook and scared to look in my eyes
I stole that f*ckin’ clock
I took the time and I
Came up from behind
And pretty much snuck up
And butt-f*cked this game up
Better be careful when you bring my name up
F*ck this fame, that ain’t what
I came to claim but the game
Ain’t gonna be the same on the day that I leave it
But I swear one way or another I’ma make these f*ckin’ haters believe that
I swear to God, won’t spare the rod
I’m a man of my word, so your f*ckin’ heads better nod
Or I’ma f*ck around in this bitch and roast everybody
Sleep on me, that pillow is where your head’ll lie
Permanently, bitch, it’s beddy-bye
This world is my Easter egg, yeah, prepare to die
My head is swole, my confidence is up
This stage is my pedestal
I’m unstoppable, incredible
Hope you’re trapped in my medicine ball
I could run circles around you so fast your f*ckin’ head’ll spin, dog
I split your cabbage and your lettuce and olives
I’ll f*ckin’

Pick the world up and I’ma drop it on your f*ckin’ head
Bitch, I’ma pick the world up and I’ma drop it on your f*ckin’ head
And I could die now, Rebirth motherf*cker
Hop up in my spaceship and leave Earth, motherf*cker
I’m gone
Motherf*cker, I’m gone (I’m gone)

SBS, Chromosomes, an update and fortunate kids

Ahhhhhh its been sometime since i got onto my own space....and my avid readers have been complaining

I cbf wit exams and that whole period....mite as well leave it blank

Im not going to start on the world cup....dismal performances, cant beleive i went to fed square to watch the soccer to be let down...as well as forming icicles down my groin region (i still cant properly feel it down there :P) but it was great fun being free. However the one thing i cant get, is the coverage of the soccer-------SBS, arent they that channel where u flick on friday night for your erotic fantasies (dont ask me ive been told by people...honest). I swear, they must be getting more people flicking onto that damn channel on Monday morning than they have this whole year. Bloody hell, at least the real top gear buffons would know that sbs only worthwile show was the latest top gear episodes, but now that has gone its more like the chanel u would only switch to see if there was any 'intersting' documentaries.....

But on Friday, during maths we somehow got a example of chromosomes and shit like that. Bloody hell, but this kind of set of thoughts through me....those genes map out ure life,

i mean me and father both can gain muscle fast (thats rite), we both are hairy....shut up mate, and we have had some bad experiences but then both my mum and i have dense bones, thick skins, and near same personalities...

shit but i at times i wonder what if appa was a bit more taller, i to could be 6 foot like my cousins, what if i didnt get my dad's nose that is great for him but shit for me..... its just idk wat i did to get myyself in this trap, but i have to be lucky i must say

Funniest shit, monday night i had my appointment wit a doctor i havent seen any ages bascially for a year (IM A WEETBIX KID) and shes gone and asked me to take of my top ;) god appa was like WTF and turned away, but i just took it of and then BAM-SHA-KA-LA-KA

hahahaha naa it was more like....what have u done to ureself, ure face is black but ure body is white.... LOL, u see for our curry parents, there is certain pride in the more fairer kid. Bloody hell, how many times have i seen it, the more fairer or more handsome kid getting the affection from the oldies while the dark horse (Guess who) is left for the scraps. Thing is i seriosly havent thought about it in this sense coz i was carefree, but now shitt all these thoughts are popping in. But i think in the curry world, there is a big notion about getting the best person as ure partner----and one if that characteristic is to be fair, good job, and good marks

I swear my mate who i have now got u guys to get acquainted to.... yeah well we had a convo and ill show u an excert of what he thinks on the topic of marks and girls.

Strike me down but did i ask to get a fairly shit score....no....but why does it hurt when my dad does the whole i work hard for u, give u everything, and what u return back....im disappointed in u....

do u knoe that i to knoe ure struggles, the pain, the anguish. What i would do to swap positions so u can get that second chance u want so badly to get out of the shit hole u work in rite now. Hell, why do stuff and then feel bad...is it being guilty, or is it because i cant keep up the burden of having all ure dreams and plans on my broadening shoulders....yes i stopped all excersices cause u said so but wtf do i get back...a whole lot of shit...did i ask to fall for a .......nup lets not go there mate but it hurts, its going away slowly but eventually but i cant bring my face to a metre to hers, im not sure what would happen....would i yell at her, would i kiss her, or would i stand there solomenly just wishing it was all a drama whose end would finish wit a happy ending....but u knoe wat there's that chick in yr 8 i was talking about yeah...damn has she grown into a stunner, and there is a bit of sparks still there, mite have to rekindle them but then again....i dont wanna be hurt again

Well atleast he's getting there... but shit im not gonna commentate on his thoughts, but i hate to be him rite now. Coming from the top of the sky to now rock solid is tuff, real tuff but hes pulling through. Ithink having time to think was good for the kid but it still....hang in there

But while we r on the topic of kids (just quickly).....just be careful what u see in them, i was at a tiny party for a uncle, and shit there was these two kids who from afar looked like ure average 7yr old, but upclose, they both were suffering from Autism....it got me hard, real bad coz it got me to appreciate how lucky i am but at the same time sad coz there is so many people wasting there oppurtunities on booze and shit that is simply gonna drag them down....god dammit, there parents though, i feel for them really, their mum is basically barreling down into depression of what the dilemna of both kids are in-Kids born from true love will became great-well i hope it does in this case

Listening to Baby steps by Varsity (THANKS ROLL UNIT)

Bis Spater one and all

P.s GO MAKE ME A SANDWICH hehehehehe naaw jks, im karen LuCk

P.s.s Im losing my well defined body which is now being appreciated by the LADIES ;)

Poems, comics and whole lot of memories to incinerate

Enn Devadai ennai parthal,

avar parvai uyir edukum, uyir kuddukum,

aval odu kann maymarindu parkam tonum,

untha madari ahna kangal

eppoluthu naan avatha pural, aanal oru veen thugadi ahna pural

yenn kadhal seriyo thuvaro, yen kadhal vailiyo sugomo

piidithum piidithum, padathum, paduthum Unnale

I tried to see the good But darkness ate your soul It ate away the sweetness And left nothing but a hole........taste so sour....smell so sour.......feel so sore......

Hmmmmm...i kind of felt for him when i didn’t post the poem so i told him to water it down as a teaser of some sort, one that could be used as a bait and thanks to a chakara kuti (don’t worry even i don’t understand what that means) i shall show his talents in literature ;)

Except what literature is and what reality is a whole lot of different. Yes we can relate to them, however can u really see ureself that farfetched.

CHANGE OF TOPIC :D

There i was one morning without a drive of seeing the end of the one that just got born when i decided to skip looking over covalent bonding, and instead just rummage through some of the material online, and ohhh was i surprised by some of the shit im seeing. I quote “the change rooms as big as Arjun’s dick” bro, we all know its big but not this big ;), but later on i found some real good shit, SUITS= (oi u didn’t copyrite this shit) idk about u but im a different person at home than i am in the public. I aint gonna go into detail, but to be honest its like changing clothes.

Each style represents u....yes i do wear mostly casual or sport related things but shut up.... me as soon as i put my special jacket, i become that hotshot that can do anything he wants, grab a person’s attention for as long as he willed, unstoppable in other words, and then i have my long sleeves that i wear to be serious, and on the task....place the two together and here comes TROuBLE, lately ive put up a new suit, one that im not sure people will see through (Dont fricken come up to me and tell/ask shit, u only are gonna seriously aggravate me :P) so stfu and keep moving..wtf is wit this DNM i swear next time i hear it at school....;)

its funny how anything that falls smack straight into my face when im either at home or at school i can brush up wit a simple 1% of my total intellect, however when its to and from places i would say im the most vunerable... yes just when im changing outfits... just as superman has kryptonite as his nemesis weapon of choice, green lanten and his mind, wolverine and his quest for self realisation, i to will lose, and will lose badly if it ever happens. Well the easy thing for them is that even though they have to live it, they don’t necessarily see it next to them, every day of the working week.

How were we brought to this world huh, oh whole LOT OF CRYING and wit nothing. Yep zip, zero, zilch whatever u want to express zero as. So why do we want so much, why do we want to have that Rolex or Omega instead of a simple watch that costs only 10 dollars....hmm do i call it ego or isit something else, idk about u but i feel for those people who believe it is ‘cool’ or a simply ‘Catch up time’ who simply go shopping for the sake of it. I mean with the money you spend on a Calvin Klein t shirt or a Versace dress, that 150 or 300 + clothing could have been sent of to a world aid centre who could ues it to feed and clothe a half a village . No, im not asking u to call up Tim Costello (faggot) but im asking u to think about those people.

Idk if i should be saying this, but one of my amma’s old neighbour, and when i mean old back when she was still at her dad’s stomping ground, there used to be a boy several years younger than her who was like, hmmm u could say a brother of sorts. Well he somehow managed to track down amma through facebook (SCORE FOR ME) and filled in the details that went blank when amma set of for Colombo. The guy is a fricken genius, he has studied for basically all his life, now finally finishing of his phd at the age of 31, has a kid. You would think he is set for life, well a life that may be cut short anytime soon. Heart attack, or as they say Cardio ....something like that...:D but wat makes it worse is that he and his 4 other brothers have all chipped in to run a ashram....orphanage of sorts, for where theyre mother can teach and nurture these parent less, money less children. Interesting how this life works, studying furiously, without the slightest regard for his health for the future, shows a future with no health. But what struck a chord in both me and my amma was when he said he felt like going back and living the high life of school again....The excitement, the friendship, the girls, the romances, the fights, all of these things. Simply heart breaking.

TO EMOTIONAL CHANGE OF TOPIC :D

Hmmmmm well i did say i would show u my own poem....but before that i would like to talk about my good mate. Bull shit this life is i swear....check out wat someone wrote to him

But now that u know she has moved on its easy for you and you can move on, even though now u will be saying I don't want to move on later u will be like why did I waste so much time on her? But we fall we fall hard and eventually we get back up again. And when u get back up again ***** u will feel on top of the world again. Even though it may take a while.

First of can i say that he isn’t saying.... ‘i don’t want to move on’, instead why can’t i.... i mean its not his fault that whenever he see’s he just wants to rage or go of home.... there is so much misconception around his fiasco that i feel for him, as a friend i cant do anything apart from tell him not to do anything irrational, not to cry for her when she is visably in pain. I mean from wat he tells me, he wants to be friends with everyone having no enemies, however i believe it is the situation that is causing him to be seen alone. One example, the bus, OMG i swear, he cant talk to her group of friends just coz she’s there, dammit AHahahahaha my amma would say continuesly

Ithu yena mayam...What is this illusion

But the thing is, he cant do anything can he, i mean all he feels is pure emotion...one incident that he forgot to mention to me was his run in wit her on the way home....BLOODY HELL... just to avoid her he goes to a seat that was a few rows in front. Now here is the killer blow, the same seat he proposed and serenaded her. So u tell me, hw would it feel to be remembering all those memories flooding through the fragile, temporary gates he just constructed....no matter how low she could go, no matter how far she went, there is no other torture, and sentence than to see someone go that means the world to u

Goddammit, in the mood im in rite now i mite as well put up his original shit

Memorise that i can’t erase

Part of me that i can’t replace

I was lost and now its gone without a trace

I just find it hard to breathe

Baby i wish that i could tell u im sorry

Because Baby i need u, baby i need u, coz im sorry

I wish that i could have u here today

Coz Baby i need u, baby i need u, coz im sorry

Now im stuck in this place coz baby u were everything and now im left with nothing

And if u didn’t knoe, baby i love u so, i wish we made it a good thing

How i could i let u go, i got to let u knoe that u were the best thing

Baby i wish that i didn’t stop talking

Girl I swear ill do, anything

Coz i wish i didn’t walk away

With that as a ending note

Adeusinho

P.s. do me a favour and listen to Nothing Ever Hurt like You by James Morrison pretty sums up.....ill put it up if i figure how

P.s.s. I must say this is one heck of a post...longest one ive done, but then again a lot has happened i guess.....

P.s.s.s. When is the next god dam party for this school, i swear don’t make my party the one to wait for...........mind it ;)